So April 1....

I have been going back and forth over when to start and Monday and then Monday and then Monday....Monday's kept coming and I never got started. Part of it comes from my back and body not cooperating, part of it is the restructuring and redoing of the house and trying to reclaim it from the winter let down...and then the last part is just ugghhh everyone starts on Monday. Well I have decided April 1st...it is a Wednesday, by Thursday the house will be done because I have an awesome someones showing up...and I will have been back on my pills for enough time for my body to have healed and function right.

Timing is everything and I am making the best of it this time.

 I know I have said it before, but this is the last time I start. This time I finish it! I am finally in a good head space, I have all the tools and knowledge, and I have a drive. See I have never been one to finish what I start. I get bored, I get discouraged, or I simply just fall into the WHY BOTHER?? I am so over that attitude. 

I have decided this time around, I will weigh once a week, measure once a month, and watch my clothes and energy level. If I miss a workout, oh well. I will have my fitbit set to 5000 steps and if I go over it, great. If I don't or I don't hit the 5000. Oh well to that too. My weight loss is going to happen in my time, with my program, and there will be no deadlines. I am gonna break it down into much smaller goals as well. 50 lbs is a lot and it is hard when you don't see the results like you want.

I know I have mentioned school a few times, I am currently taking a psychology class and in this class in the first week we talked about positive psychology. Well this got me thinking...what if I applied that to my life? How much could it hurt...turns out, not at all. I still have my moments where I can be judgmental, I still have my moments where I am pissed off at the world, but they are getting to be further and further in between. I also am pretty motivated to finish school work on time, and to maintain a 3.5 or higher. So I got to thinking...what if I applied that drive to the lifestyle stuff? That is this years experiment. April 1st, I will post

my starting weights and measurements and photos. I will then post weekly weigh ins on the Facebook page and do a monthly progress report here. You guys are my accountability. I am actually excited about this time!!! Not like all the others, excited yes, but nervous about failing. Well no fear of failing this time, because there is a sense of urgency, but not a timeline, not a set deadline, and above all else....A sense of can I let go of the fear of what happens when I am a smaller person. It is shear wonder and a new and better me.

So, time to get to my to do list and prep for next week. Back to school work, and time to play wife and mom again. Until next time....

Happy Dieting!!!