I am in the middle of a conundrum. I have had success with OA, working slowly, and rewiring the brain but I feel like I am standing at a crossroads.
Maybe it is just the group I am in on Facebook, maybe it is the concept in general...maybe I am getting better finally. I just don't know if it is the right place for me. I am also dealing with a bit on my plate on the personal level. I feel like there is a major storm brewing and I am not liking where this may be going.
So what do I do?
I ave recently joined a group full of women that inspire and push...and look pretty doing it lol. My OA group doesn't have that togetherness...it is all about you must do it my way. Well, your way is not helping me as much anymore. I see the results others are having in the group and I want that and I know following the OA stuff is not going to put me on that level.
Now I am not saying that I am willing to give up all the lessons learned in OA or the reading, but the humdrum stuff. It is said to take what you need and leave the rest..so I am taking my toys and going home!!! But am I really ready to do that? I want to give back and do service, but at this point, I do not know how helpful I would be. I have no time for me let alone someone else.
So I am trying something. I am trying a new way of journaling and doing things thanks to a gift from a friend. I have been thinking about changing things up for phase 4 anyway and that starts in two weeks. I am gonna start tomorrow morning for week 3...I am gonna fall short of 42,000 steps this week BUT last week I had 48,132. That is 6,132 steps over and because of that I am having a hard time recovering and finally caught up on sleep after the two crazy weeks.
There was an awesome thing that happened today though: I hit 500 miles walked!!!
So for today I am focusing on the fact that it is 168,000 steps in 28 days and that I will accomplish that and praying and figuring out where I belong....basically OA or a fit and empowering women's group and putting the personal issues in the Lord's hands!!
Welcome to my head...I am fun loving, mom, wife, BRAT, writer who works two jobs. I also read and write smut when not writing the blog. I am also a coffee drinker who does not function well without one or four coffees a day. I speak in movie and TV quotes, song lyrics, and all blended together with a splash of sass and snark. I do not watch what I say, how I say, and hell sometimes I don't even know why I said what I said. The F word is a coma here and I honestly I am sorry not sorry wink wink
Saturday, November 7, 2015
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