So here we are in week 2 of phase 2 and Thursday was a a horrible, terrible, no good, very bad day. See I got up in the mindset I was gonna be productive, I had a few places to be Thursday night...had some baking to do for one of the places. So I was up early working on cleaning up the kitchen so I could bake...I sit down while dishwasher is running so I can work on some school work (See productive stuff!!) I hear water dripping, I look into the kitchen and yup....I have a river runs through it 2 filming under my sink....I have food coming up where my washer drains....I call maintenance out they get me up and running...My bad day did not end there...Leave everything under your sink out and the doors open so it dries...So no baking and just in a funk. I had this mindset that a reese cup, a mountain dew, and a cigarette would fix it all...I had none of the above, but that was the mood.
So I did all I had to do, got home and thought kiddo has been up and going since 9:30....she will crash. LOL that is a good one Mom....She and I went to bed at midnight. Between the funk I was in and the arguing that the cat did not need to be picked up, put in a box, or not a horse nor was my couch a trampoline. I wanted food...massive amounts of junk food and while yes I have chocolate brownie frozen yogurt (Schwan's brand at that) and I have chocolate push ups...Slimfast peanut butter and chocolate snack bites...I opted for a serving of regular triscuits. Still cost me my 2.00 for my rewards jar...BUT I opted for those because I knew the others, one serving would not be it! I knew I was taking the whole half gallon of froyo, I knew it would have been 2 or more packages of the other! Even sweet rice cakes were dangerous. IT WAS HARD to avoid all of that, but not impossible.
Long story short...I am still in recovery, I will never be "recovered" enough that I could have a reese cup and a mountain dew. They will always be the bane of my existence. But I can have other chocolate and peanut butter combinations with positive results!
I also want to pause here....Food is not a friend, not the enemy, but not a friend! It will tell all of your secrets and it will go away!!! It tells your secrets by hanging out on your hips and in your behind! It goes away because we eat it to feel better, for about a half hour. Spend that half hour reaching out...No matter where your bestie is and what time of day they will be there...a twinkie is not a fill in for that!!
I also had an epiphany this week...When I stopped living in my put of self despair and eating my feelings...when I literally cleared food of my proverbial plate of life stuff, I had room for new things and hobbies. On Thursday, one of the things that helped me feel better was not a Mountain Dew, but doing my make up. I also have started putting more effort into me. Even jeans, t-shirts, and hoodies can be spiced up with make up and jewelry...(Speaking of, check out
TLC Handmade
for one of a kind pieces! 90% of the jewelry in my pics is TLC so that is where Spoiled Momma gets her look from, if you were wondering, but before I digress...). If you don't take just a few minutes for you, you have nothing else for anyone!!
And as Moms, Wives, and Students....any title you may have, this is important...Self care and Self confidence are traits that we have to work on keeping! We set the example. You can not expect the little people watching to be fully empowered if we see ourselves as frumpy!!
 |
| My self-care gift to me! 32 Ounce Water Cup! |
The cup may say coffee, but this is the new water cup, I earned it! I needed it and above all else...I invested in me! It is almost noon and I am about to fill it the second time today which means I am about to have 64 ounces of my water in the books! (PS, my ice is still ice!)
Before I sign off, I told the triscuit story for a reason...I used a phrase that I used once before and my washer backed up...I uttered the Phrase, I got this...I got complacent. I was not just confident, I was borderline cocky...I mean here I am down quiet a few pounds...I am losing inches...people are complimenting how good I look....I got this...NO,
on my own I got nothing....God's got this. I was lucky this time he used my dishwasher and not my washer to show me this fact. I got nothing on my own and I can only do this...I can only do what He has in the plans for me for 2016. This is not my year, this is God's year to use me to do his work! I am but a pile of clay for his molding!
So signing off with this nugget and keep an eye on
Spoiled Momma
I have found a perfect challenge for February and focusing on self love and care! I will be kicking it off on Monday!!!
Till next week!!!
 |
| My reminder and motto verse of 2016 |
