Acceptance...what does it really mean?

 In my life I have two chronic conditions I deal with. I have fibromyalgia and I have a food addiction. Luckily for today I am living in recovery from the food addiction, I have 399 days food sober. Food addiction is hard because we have to eat. What we don't have to eat is all the junk...I do not even eat pizza anymore. I still like my cheeseburger though. Those are few and far between and there are foods and drinks I will never have again. I accepted that and in return I have a new lease on life.

 Accepting the fibromyalgia was harder. The was a time I felt as if I did not have it...but found out I was just too busy to feel it. When I became a stay at home mom, the symptoms hit me like a ton of bricks and add in the depression....Food was my constant comfort. Not realizing that I was doing more damage than good...I had falsely accepted that my life was just these four walls and food. I was so wrong.

There was an event that took place in early 2015 that changed everything, and sent me into a place of chaos. I am not a fan of change...and the event was changing EVERYTHING!!

 In this state of chaos, I found out there was more to life....I started seeing that there was a whole world beyond my front porch. I also found a new plan. There was a failure to launch on a few things I tried to become involved in, but when I accepted the path that the Lord had put me on...I started to not only survive, I started to thrive....in my chaos, I found a new found passion for life and for activities I long forgotten about.

 I first had to understand I was hurting myself with the life I was living. I was checked out and I was not only hurting me, but my family as well. Slowly, I began to accept I had to make changes and I had to set the example. In that revelation, I found the strength, and I came back to the faith that I was raised in.

Now, there was a time, I went kicking and screaming. I did not want to change...I mean who really wants to adult??? That means bills, laundry, dishes...and did you know a family wants fed EVERY DAY??!!?? But, now I do it with a grateful heart. Because these two that drive me batty...are my biggest supporters! They are my cheerleaders and my husband...man, that man....He has saved me from me more times then I can count. He does something very important...he does not FIX me, he lets me handle that. He is my rock and he will help me up, but he will not hold me up...I must stand on my own two feet...and in that I accept his help up but never demand more than that!

I am no longer ashamed of who I was...who I was brought me to who I am. Who I am is an amazing woman who takes things one day at a time, I love hard and I defend mine. I am a mom, a wife, a volunteer, student, a writer, and I am a recovering addict. I will never say I am fully recovered, there is always a chance of a relapse...but I accept this. By accepting this, I can prevent it. Acceptance...

For today...all is well in my house even with a bit of stress and transition just around the corner.