And a switch flipped!!

As with anyone my life has been in a tailspin for a minute! It started a little earlier for me on March 3rd. I was laid off and at that moment the only concern was finding something that would at least supplement until I could find a job that would become a career. Then the news of the coronavirus started seeping in slowly and ten days later, the layoff is a temporary blessing as schools and things began to slowly shut down for a moment. Another seven days and a kick in the gut and reality set in...schools had been closed for the remainder of the calendar year. In a matter of twenty-seven days, my entire life flipped upside down and I had to figure out how and what were the right steps forward.

The first thing I did was have a very serious long conversation with the hubby. We determined that with the uncertainty and with the impending reality of trying to find not only a job but also lining up child care for almost six months that included homeschooling as well as maintaining the house due to having an essential worker already in the home, that stress would be eating me up. I do not do well with stress, I, in fact, have been known to shut down and withdraw when the stress gets to me. My husband knew this would not be good for any of us, so we decided that a job would come when it was time and when we really needed it. The focus would be on the mini, my health and fitness, and on the house. Considering that as well as homeschooling the mini, I also had to maintain my education goals as well.


So after this conversation, I set up plans and I got up and followed that plan one morning. Then, it happened the severity of the situation hit me. I couldn't completely breathe and my world spun...I was officially hitting a state of overwhelmed. So it was a short-lived sigh of relief to an extent. I spent the last few weeks, doing the bare minimum. I spent the last few weeks keep ing up with the house, doing school work sporadically and then vegging out. Well, this is no good for anyone. Not me, not my husband and damn sure not my mini. Then I got an email on the 27th of March that changed it all.



 It was an email from a virtual race company that I used in 2017 when I did 2017 miles in 2017. They are doing a free event for April, one race a week allowing me to move through them in gradual effort from a 5K to an ultra. So, I did what anyone who loves virtual races does and I signed up. I was all set, every week I will push a little farther and by the time I ended April, not only would I have completed a 5k...I will have completed my first half, marathon, and an ultra! I started April in that same March frame of mind. I was still stuck in a mood and a mode of well I am kinda moving every day. Last night, sitting on the couch...a switch just flipped inside.


This is not a sentence having to stay at home and homeschool and not go out... this is an opportunity. This is a moment that I can truly look at everything and not only make a difference in my life but in my mini's life as well. So what better way to make a difference then by setting the example. My husband, being the amazing man that he is helped me invest in a Bosu ball, an aerobic step, a stabilizing disc, and they are ordered and not here yet-but TRX straps. Zumba, strength training, and walking virtual races are my BFF workouts. (Thanks again Coach Tulin for showing me where fitness can be fun and how to date a workout!)

As of yesterday afternoon, we and by we, I mean Mini is on spring break. So for the next week, we are gonna tackle the last two big reorganization projects for the house and get us a routine down on paper. This can be tweaked as needed or even scrapped and a whole new one developed. This also allows me to make sure I am getting up and getting in my self-care...my workout, my quite coffee moments, and I am making my writing for fun a priority again ( I mean-November was the last blog...YUCK!!!). I can also put myself in a frame of mind that I can be a better mom, teacher, and wife. This is not a punishment and it is not a time for me to shrink! It is a time for me to grow, to stay present and focused on what my end game is here.

My end game is unique to me and it is not to lose weight (that will happen with time!!) it is to be the healthiest version of myself that I can be...my fortieth birthday is in 8 months and a day and I want to go into my forties in much better health than I went into my twenties and hell even my thirties. So with the switch flipped, I have a new focus. I am making the most of every day.  I am going to share how being 39 with a chronic condition is not a life sentence but yet an excuse to create, not find a new normal. In this season, my normal is being a stay at home, homeschooling Mom. It is not forever and it is just my current season. As with all seasons, it will change-just unsure when. So, for now, I am going to roll with it. In the words of another great friend...

So I am going to make the best of it! 

Till next time y'all-

Audie