The first story is written...the rough draft. The draft that you can read, understand it, but know details are missing. There is the first rewrite with more details happening. In the process of doing this...I found me again.
I found my happy, my missing piece. The secret to that was simple. I am a writer. It is not want to be anymore because to be a writer I just have to write. Now while I am happy let me point out this does not mean I am without stress, that I don't get angry, it just means that at my core my happy has returned.
I also want to point out that this also does not mean I have found my purpose...but currently I am not looking for it. I am living in this moment of freedom and clarity of finding a way to do what I want while still doing what I need.
With all that said...this week I learned that nothing is set in stone-you can always go back and change how things end. Speaking of ending, it doesn't always end where you think it will. It may just be the beginning. You also never know when the ending may come or how many parts of the story there are. You just write until you get to a point where it all feels complete.
I also rediscovered the freedom in writing. I no longer feel like I have to just recap my week or that I have to have a clear topic. So I am not relying on my readers as much. Does not mean my recovery is any less important, it just means I am no longer white knuckling recovery. It means I have found freedom in recovery. The readers are there when, not if, but when I need them. They have become tools.
Wrapping this up here...I am spending a lot of time in my head here lately and loving it because I am doing what I love. I am creating a story that has never been told, even if it is with characters already created. Fanfiction is a great avenue for me to begin again in! Being a writer simply means I write. That folks is what I have been doing for 11 years-that moment that when it clicks you are living your dream...priceless!
Till Next Time-
Audie
